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black　cars　being　delivered　to　a　certain　Upper　East　Side　garage。　Looks　like　a　few　of　us　are　getting

what　we　asked　for；　except。　？　Dad；　I　asked　for　pink！

They　know　you　cheated

For　those　of　you　who　cheated　on　your　final　exams；　we　know　who　you　are；　and　your　teachers

know；　too。　We　saw　how　you　finished　early　and　spent　the　rest　of　the　time　writing　notes　and　doing

actressy　face　exercises？S！！　They？re　only　overlooking　it　because　they　want　to　get　rid　of　you。　Why

they　even　bother　giving　seniors　finals　is　beyond　me。

A　remedy　for　pregraduation　jitters

Of　course；　there？s　nothing　to　be　nervous　about。　All　we　have　to　do　is　look　gorgeous　and　accept

our　diplomas。　But　we　are　nervous　nonetheless。　Maybe　because　we　have　to　go　through　it　with　our

parents　watching。　Maybe　because　we　have　no　idea　what　es　next。　You　know　how　the　school

nurse　always　prescribes　the　same　thing　no　matter　what？s　wrong　with　you？　Chew　a　Pepto…Bismol。

Gargle　with　salt　water。　Well；　I？m　the　same　way：　champagne　and　a　boy。　Take　one　dose　and　then

repeat　every　fifteen　minutes　until　symptoms　subside。

Happy　Graduation！　See　you　at　the　party　afterwards！

You　know　you　love　me。

gossip　girl

Pomp　and　circumstance

Outside　Brick　Church　on　Park　Avenue　and　Ninety…second　Street；　a　throng　of　black　town　cars

released　women　in　Chanel　couture　and　men　and　boys　in　Ralph　Lauren　Purple　Label　into　the

church　to　watch　their　daughters　and　sisters　graduate　in　Constance　Billard？s　mencement

exercises。　It　was　a　balmy　June　morning；　and　a　pleasant　breeze　rustled　the　crab　apple　trees

bordering　the　sidewalk；　scattering　petals　and　pretty　green　leaves　onto　the　avenue。　The　lovely

redbrick　church　with　its　sturdy　white　columns　and　creeping；　well…tended　green　ivy　looked　like

something　out　of　a　picture　book。　In　fact；　today　the　entire　Upper　East　Side　seemed　picturesque　and

soaked　in　sun　and　apple　blossom　perfume；　for　today　was　graduation　day。

Hooray！

Isabel？s　mom；　Titi　Coates；　craned　her　surgically　enhanced　neck　to　survey　the　well…dressed

audience；　nearly　popping　the　buttons　on　her　hot…pink…and…gold　Versace　cap…sleeved　coat…dress。　？I

heard　Harold　Waldorf　flew　in　from　Paris　with　his　flaming　French　boyfriend　to　see　Blair　graduate

today；？　she　whispered　to　Lillian　van　der　Woodsen；　who　was　seated　in　the　dark　mahogany　pew　next

to　her。　？He　even　had　a　red　convertible　Peugeot　sent　over　in　parts；　with　a　special　French　mechanic

to　assemble　it　for　her。？

Mrs。　van　der　Woodsen　shook　her　head。　She　liked　gossip；　but　only　the　harmless　kind？about

people？s　dogs　or　their　golf　game。

Harmlessgossip？　What　would　be　the　point？

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